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“What Question Has Someone Asked You That Secretly Broke Your Heart?” (40 Answers)




Sometimes, when we’re at our most vulnerable, the most innocent question can hit us deep in the feels. And stay there forever.


Whether it’s your child asking if you could come back to a store for a toy when you have enough money, or a stranger wondering if “you’re a girl with a hot sister?”, some questions are heartbreakingly sweet, others painfully arrogant, and some plain evil.

So when a Reddit user asked people to share that one question someone asked them that secretly broke their heart, people had a lot to share. After all, as much as words have a healing power, they can also hurt us really badly.



As we passed the toy aisle at the store, “I know you don’t have much money right now, but maybe when you get some we could come back and get a toy?”

I was not doing well financially back then and my daughter brought me to tears in the middle of the store.

Image credits: TheCurls


«You’ve never beaten me or told me I couldn’t do something. Is that normal?»


My first girlfriend told me that. I have never felt such a wave of anger, sadness, and heartbreak wash over me like I did when I heard that

Image credits: justsomerandomyguy


I have a stutter, when I was a kid I had to read a page of a book to the class. I stuttered, and the teacher said ‘can you even read’ and that [friggin] broke my 13 year old heart. No one takes stuttering seriously.

Image credits: ape-with-keyboard


First day of preschool for my three year old son. The first time he would ever be away from Mom & Dad at the same time.


I brought him to the room and expected a meltdown, but instead he confidently strutted, and I do mean strutted into the classroom.

Three hours later, I picked him up. He was ok until we got to the car when he said, in quiet sad voice «l thought you were coming with,» followed by an even sadder quieter «Why did you leave me?»

Image credits: RelevantNostalgia


We had some kind of talent show in elementary school and and all the parents sat in the gym and watched us, everybody had someone there except me, so this kid in my class asked where my family was and I just shrugged my shoulders and he asked «Doesn’t anyone love you?» and I had to excuse myself and cry in the bathroom, because I knew he was right, nobody loved me. I had tried to keep it a secret and I was terrified that everyone at school would know.

Image credits: Veganmon



When I worked in a juvenile residential drug rehab, a 12 year old asked me why everyone had a problem with her boyfriend. He was 32.

She had been so mistreated and abused, she legitimately couldn’t comprehend the problem everyone had with their relationship.

Image credits: steeple_fun


I finally got out of an abusive relationship after many years. When I finally did my mom said you’re a hard person to like and nobody else will love you. Do you really think you deserve better ?

Image credits: NotAPunishment



I was having fertility problems and couldn’t get pregnant after 4 yrs of trying. A child once asked me “Do you think there just aren’t any babies who want you to be their mother?”

Image credits: stick_a_fork_in_it


I was like 22 and it was probably 10pm or so at a Walmart. I was on my way to a party and stopped for beer. The store was fairly empty and as I was in the beer aisle, I see this kid completely by himself.

He was about 5 and at first I thought it was kind of funny because he was trying to pick up a case of beer. I waited like 30-60 seconds, looking around for this kid’s mom/dad to come get him. A couple people walked right by him like it was normal, so then I started getting worried. I picked up my two cases of beer and walked over and kindly asked him if he lost his mom or needed help.


The kid completely ignored the question and instead was thoroughly impressed that I was strong enough to carry two cases of beer. Eventually an employee noticed and came over as well. I told her everything I knew and she took over and told him that she was going to bring him to find his mom.

As he was walking away he kept looking back at me and I smiled and said goodbye. The kid stopped and said “can I just come home with you? I don’t like my mom.”

I was caught off guard so I just laughed and told him the lady was going to help him. Now I’ll never know the full story, or what happened to him but the more I think about it – that kid more than likely had a pretty sh*tty childhood. I mean, the store wasn’t busy and it was late at night on a weekday. It really makes you wonder why he was there in the first place, how he got separated from his mom and why would he ask to go with a complete stranger instead of worrying about where his mom was?


It still makes me sad. Hope everything worked out for the little dude.

Image credits: PrometheusAborted


My ex asked me what I liked to do with my family growing up.

Made me realize my family never did anything together and I literally had no answer to such a basic question.

Image credits: don_juicy



My dad was active in the local Japanese community assisting new immigrants from Japan to get acclimated to living in Hawaii showing them the various neighborhoods, churches, schools, shopping areas etc. When WW2 broke out, he was arrested for this activity and was imprisoned in the Mainland for 5 years. At grade school, our teacher asked me in front of the entire class how it felt to be the son of a traitor to the US?

Image credits: HiBrucke6


My aunt asked me «why are your crying? You’re supposed to be a man» I was crying because my 2 years old niece got a second degree burn and I could hear her screaming from the doctor’s office

Image credits: scar-shiraya


My five-year-old niece: Why am I’m so ugly that mommy doesn’t love me?

Image credits: Babaloo_Monkey



Said bye to grandma before leaving the house. About 20 seconds later after saying bye to everyone else she asks «When are you going to say bye to me?»

She died two weeks after that.

Image credits: BOSD12


Had a 4 year old child who had been horribly abused and passed from family member to family member why no one loved him. It was so heart breaking and made me hate his family so much more. With my help his aunt was able to gain full custody and got him into counseling. He’s doing much better now and is still with his aunt who is doing everything she can to give him a good life

Image credits: daisydoom456



«Wait, aren’t you going to hit me?»
I worked as a music teacher, and had a 15 year old student who originally came from an African country play a passage incorrectly on the instrument repeatedly. We only had one instrument of the kind she played, so I reached out my hand and asked her to hand me the instrument over to show her, when she saw me playing, she asked me that question with genuine confusion, and I realised what hell her school life in her home country had been.

She not only thought I would hit her for not playing correctly, but also that she deserved it.
I felt like crying when I got home that night.

Image credits: steamtrainers


A few years ago I was at a small family gathering. We had them fairly often. Just me, my siblings, parents and niece’s and nephew.


I remember going out the back for a cigarette and my niece asked «why are you always sad?». She would’ve been about 6yo at the time.

I was going through a horrendous mental period that involved a lot of alcohol, medication, and sleepless nights.

Of course I told her I was fine, just a little tired from working hard.


I remember thinking about that interaction the rest of the night.

Image credits: Clinodactyl


“Can I wish for my sister?” – A 10-year-old student of mine whose big sister died 4 years ago. We were working on an activity about dreams and aspirations for their futures.

Image credits: missadinosaur


My grandmother leaned to me and asked, «Did Dan die?»


We were at a family gathering and she didn’t see my uncle Dan. He had passed away the previous year. Grandma’s descent into dementia was in the very early stages. There were several layers of heartbreak.

Image credits: monobak


“Why are you so quiet” or “why don’t you talk?” When I was proud of myself for talking more than normal

Image credits: MundaneShoulder6


When I was 19, I hung out with a cute girl from my high school that I never got to hang with when we were in school. Had a great day together, and that night she asked, “can we be like secret friends or something? I don’t really hang out with people like you.”


Never hung out again.

Image credits: prstele01


Being asked by my grandma who I was because I wasn’t her granddaughter. And when my «best friend» asked why I ever thought we were friends… The first broke my heart, but I understood it wasnt malicious she had Alzheimer’s. The second one has caused lasting trust issues and an very difficult time making friends.

Image credits: violetsky5


Why don’t u have children? Don’t u like kids? I can’t have children

Image credits: TelephoneBusy9594



When the vet said:

«Your cat has an inoperable cancerous tumor. The kindest thing you can do to end his suffering is to put him to sleep. Do you wish to do this?»

Image credits: Back2Bach


I work at a primary school supporting kids in class. I’ve had kids ask me “why do I keep trying with them, clearly they are useless and dumb?” “Why do they have to be such a bad/naughty kid?” Even one asked me “why do I like that kid? They are so bad.” I have a million and one answers that suit the situation but it breaks my heart, especially when the “bad kid” in question is actually a very sweet child who has a really rough start to life and because of that makes poor choices. I cried with joy when the kid was invited to their first birthday party.

Image credits: Superb_Rutabaga



Not directly to my face, but my mom has been asked quite often if I was adopted, because I look absolutely nothing like her (I look like a female version of my dad). The only reason it pains me a bit is because my mom almost died while giving birth to me, and she went through a ton of complications and surgeries, just to have people question it all. Having said that, I have nothing against adoption btw, I fully support and encourage it.

Image credits: tadadesae


During college, parents took a friend and I out to dinner. Very normal dinner, chit chatted about whatever. After we left and were walking back to my car, he turns to me and says «Is that what a normal relationship is like?»

We talked more after that, I had met his parents a few times and they seemed strict but never seemed to have a terrible relationship. Turned out apparently his dad had cheated on his mom multiple times, dad had zero respect for any of my friends sisters and essentially expected them to do all the housework while the men did «guy stuff.» Hunting, training for sports, school, etc. Turned out his childhood was pretty fucked, dad was never around and he had to essentially be the father figure in the house. As the oldest child, never really saw a normal loving relationship that he could look up to. My friend is a really nice guy, still has some messed up views of relationships though. I never realized how «abnormal» my very normal family/childhood was.

Image credits: Spirited-Cucumber-82



«is your dad dead?»

The taxi driver who was taking me to college since my dad could no longer drive me, as he was infact: dead.

This was like a week after his funeral, I was eager to get back to college for some normality and a touch of denial so it was a huge slap in the face.

Image credits: Homo-Homie



I have a stutter and people always ask me why I’m so quiet it hurts because I want to be social but whenever I try I tend to be ignored or cut off half way through my sentence, like I want to be social and speak to people but it’s almost impossible for me

Image credits: 0b_server


This isn’t really a question but more of a comment. My best friend at the time was talking about how a kid in their class was causing a mess at a museum they went to on a field trip, and they were talking about how he said he had ADHD. “that makes a lot of sense, i can’t be around people with that”, they said. There was thirteen year old me, who had been diagnosed with ADHD just a week before. That was…interesting.

Image credits: glitterxtimes


«Is this your room? You’d never be able to tell if a boy or girl lived here.» Going on to heavily imply that my lack of possessions/decorations = lack of identity/personality when in reality my family was just poor.

Image credits: downtownmischief



My grandma died unexpectedly in 2011 from surgery complications. Threw clots with a medication meant to stop clots from forming. My grandpa, however, lived until 2017. I was super close with them and continued to visit even throughout undergrad and when I moved away for grad school. I remember sitting with my grandpa during one visit and it was starting to get late. My grandpa turned to me and asked me why it was so much more lonely and painful at night than it was during the day. I think that my heart shattered that day and I can’t even think about it without tearing up.


I was visiting my wife’s grandmother in an assisted-living facility for people with memory issues.

As I was walking down the hall, a little old lady that I didn’t know asked me if I could help her to her room, as she was a little unsteady on he feet.


I gave her an arm, and we walked down the hallway, having the typical friendly small talk.

When we rounded the corner, she turned to me, teary-eyed, and said, «you have to help me. I don’t know how to get out of this place. The people here think I’m so stupid, and they won’t help me. I just want to go home.»

I gently told her that I didn’t know how to leave either, and that everything would be OK. I helped her to her room, and left her there, obviously distressed and confused.


I should note that the facility was very nice, and the staff there treated my family extremely well. It just broke my heart that this poor lady was so upset and so confused, and she was likely in the same state until the day she died. It seems like a shitty way to spend the end of your life.


I was about 12 and went over to a friends house. I had my hair tied up in a ponytail and her mother looked at one of my ears and asked if I’d been in an accident.

The tops of my ears(the curved part) have always looked wonky and misshaped, I was born with them that way, but I didn’t start feeling self conscious about it or about my looks in general, until she asked me that.


May seem insignificant but I did not tie my hair up again for years following that, that’s how bad it hurt.


My ex fiancee asked me why I didnt have any friends, or hung out with people or went out to places.

It was because she put herself through crisis after crisis and I feel like I didnt have any choice but to stay and help her but when I had a breakdown and went through my own mental health crisis she broke up with me.


I hope she’s doing better but I honestly never want to talk to her again

Image credits: A_Prostitute


Oh, are you the girl with the hot sister ?


I don’t really have any close friends. It’s depressing.


On my 25th birthday, my husband and I went to dinner and we happened to run into my husbands co-worker and his wife, so we sat together for a couple drinks.

My husband said it we were out for dinner for my birthday. We were making small talk and the other guys wife asked “where are your friends at?”

I felt so embarrassed. My face gets red and my heart sinks every time I think about it.



I was at Coldstone with my friends who are married. I ordered my thing and went over to the cashier and they asked me “Are you alone?” and for some reason it just cut deep. They didn’t mean anything by it, but in that moment I realized that I felt so alone, even surrounded by friends. Then I had ice cream and felt better.

Image credits: SpelingisHerd


“Why do you sound like that? Is that your real voice?”

Mean girl training me on the phones at work.


And I was so confident on my phone voice

Image credits: jake0719


«Whats your name again?» I knew [her] for 4 years

Image credits: kirboyman06




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